I had a rough night with Nicholas last night. He's been pulling some seriously sneaky stuff lately and so Aaron and I had to deal with it. I went to bed angry at Nick and woke up still angry. I just don't trust my son anymore and I hate this feeling. I swore that if I raised my kids right, they wouldn't be pulling these kinds of stunts, and I think I got my wake up call last night. I think that I try to give God control of everything else in my life except for my kids, because I can handle my kids. I need Him to handle everything else, but I got my kids. It was like a slap in the face last night to realize that I haven't given control of them over to Him yet.
So that being said, I really wanted to eat last night. I wanted to eat a greasy hamburger. I wanted to eat some lasagna. I wanted spaghetti. I wanted enchiladas. I wanted anything to help stuff this anger down inside and bury it under a pile of food. I didn't give in and I'm glad now that I didn't, but it was hard. Being a parent is even tougher than trying to lose weight. I feel like a failure.
Oh friend, I'm so sorry. (hugs)
ReplyDeleteI'll will be praying for your son.
Despite your awful night, you were strong and didn't eat because of your emotions, that is wonderful!♥♥
Don't feel like a failure, because you're NOT! God loves your son even more than you and wants the best for him. Lift your son up to our Father and be at peace.
Love you!!
I ate it for you. Remember, I just got my drops today. We are going to be an awesome team; you, me and Erica. Nick will turn out to be just fine, because you care with all of your heart. If a child never stumbles, how do you, as the parent, grow to accommodate for the next screw-up? Somehow, we are all in this together. Love you, Mommy
ReplyDelete